The original small groups found in Acts balanced the biblical purposes in their group. Give your small groups these practical suggestions to help them balance these same purposes today.

Fellowship – Ask group member to bring in their wedding pictures to one of the meetings. Let each person talk a little about their wedding day and what is most unexpected about where they are today. If you have single people in your group, ask members to bring in their high school yearbook to show their picture. As members to explain if high school was a high or low point for them and to give one reason why.

Discipleship – At the close of a group meeting, give members the following assignment: In the coming week, find a song that describes your spiritual journey or reflects where you are now. Ask them to bring the CD and lyrics to the next group meeting, At that meeting, have people play their songs and explain why they selected that particular song.

Ministry – During the Christmas season, Christmas caroling can be a ministry. Find out where some older people in your church live and go caroling in their neighborhood. You could also carol in a nursing home or assisted-living facility. Christmas caroling is a great activity to do with some other small groups – and be sure to include the kids. After caroling, go to someone’s house for hot chocolate and cookies.

Evangelism – Most people spend Christmas afternoon sitting around reflecting on all that transpired earlier that morning and the night before. Why not start a new family tradition? On Christmas afternoon visit people in a nursing home! It can be a family or small group activity.

Worship – During worship time, have group members read a psalm or two and then spend some a few minutes in silence reflecting on the words.

Steve Gladen is the Pastor of Small Group Community at Saddleback Church. His latest book, Small Groups with Purpose: How to Create Healthy Communities, was published earlier this year.

For more ideas like these, read 250 Big Ideas for Purpose Driven Small Groups.

Last month I started a four-part examination of how following God can lead to success. I discussed the first two principles: Be clear in your direction and Be confident in your desires. This month, I will discuss the third principle.

3. BE COMMITTED TO YOUR DECISION.

That means once you have started, never, ever look back. Luke 9:62 tells us, “No man having put his hand to the plow and looking back is fit for the kingdom of heaven.” Don’t look back! Any farmer knows if he looks back while he’s plowing, he’s going to plow a crooked line. Commitment is the key to accomplishment. No commitment means you’ll never finish anything.

This is what God says in verse 9b “Joshua, don’t be terrified. Don’t be discouraged. For the Lord, your God, will be with you wherever you go.” Stick with it! Hang in there! Keep at it! Keep on keeping on! Be committed to your decision. Once you’ve made it, stick with it.

What are you committed to? A lot of people today are afraid of commitment. Maybe they begin one job and that gets tough so they switch to another. They’re constantly switching jobs. Or maybe they’re in a marriage and they won’t make a commitment to that. They move from one relationship to another. Some people flirt from one project to the next. They never finish anything. Some people, even ministry leaders, float in and out of churches because they cannot make a commitment. The favorite phrase is, “If it doesn’t work out…” The fact is, high achievers make a decision and they die by it.

Notice what Joshua did. In Joshua 3 he prepared the people to be committed, to make the effort. They were getting ready to go into the Promised Land. They were on one side of the Jordan River getting ready to cross it. This was graduation day. This was the point of no return. This was the moment of truth, the time of decision.

It’s like the Space Mountain Ride at Disneyland. There’s a long line up to Space Mountain. There are many signs as you’re going up that ramp that says, “If you have any of these problems, don’t go on this ride.” And it lists basically everything the human race could possibly have. There are many gates where you can chicken out before you get there. But at some point on the Space Mountain ride there’s no turning back. The only way out is … down.

I remember when Kay was pregnant with our first child. During the last two weeks of the pregnancy she was anxious, having never had a child before and she said, “I honestly feel like I’m at the top of a roller coaster and the only way out of this situation is to go through it.”

Sometimes that’s what you have to do. You have to commit yourself to something so there’s no way out.

Look what Joshua did in 3:5. “Then Joshua said to the people, `Consecrate yourselves. For tomorrow the Lord will do amazing things among you.’” Consecrate — that means an act of total, unconditional, unreserved commitment. It means laying it all on the line. It means going for broke. They were in essence saying, “God, we’re going to go for it even if we fail!” And that, says God, is a principle of success. Be clear in your destination. Be confident of your desires. Be committed to your decisions.

There are some things you can’t do a little at a time. Like if I were to say, “I’m going to jump across a gap. But I’m going to take several baby steps.” It wouldn’t work. You can’t jump across the Grand Canyon in baby steps. You go for broke and either do it or don’t do it. This is what God is saying here. Be committed to your decisions.

There are some things that typically will discourage you and will tempt you to give up.

1. Problems. Problems will tempt you to give up. Every good idea, has something wrong with it. Every good idea has a problem to it. You don’t reject something just because it’s is difficult. Even the Promised Land had problems. As a Christians leader, a problem should never get you down, except down on your knees. Problems should be turned into prayer requests. Problems will tempt you to give up.

2. Pressures will tempt you to give up. You want to say, “This is too much responsibility! I’m going to throw in the towel. I can’t do this on my own. I can’t handle the pressure. I want to quit. I want to give up.”

3. People will tempt you to give up, to let go of your commitments. They will disappoint you. Sometimes you’ll be misunderstood. Maybe ridiculed, maybe criticized. The fact is, negative attitudes are contagious.

Commitment is the third key in God’s strategy for success is to never give up. Be clear in your direction. Be confident in your desires. Be committed to your decisions.

Join me next month as I continue looking at God’s strategy for your success.

Rick Warren is the Founding Pastor of Saddleback Church. He is also the author of the bestselling books, Purpose Driven Life and Purpose Driven Church.

Small Group multiplication, that is, launching new Small Groups from within groups that already exist, is a very tough nut to crack. But it can be done and for some churches it is the best and/or only way to grow the Small Group Ministry.

But why is it so difficult?  Shouldn’t all groups want to multiply? Is group multiplication working for anyone?

Meet Brian Phipps.  Brian is the “Grow Pastor” at Westside Family Church in Kansas City.  He also serves as the South Central Regional Leader for the Small Group Network.  Brian is successfully shifting the DNA of his Small Group Ministry to one where group multiplication is normal, even anticipated.

On Thursday, January 12, at 12 noon Central Time, Brian and I will be discussing the process he has developed to create an atmosphere of leader development and deployment from within his Small Groups.  Brian will even share his specific strategy for beginning such a ministry.

We would love to have you join us on this one hour free conference call, simply dial into the conference number, enter the access code and enjoy the discussion.  If possible, please avoid internet based phone services.

We would love to answer all your specific questions concerning group multiplication, so please, email your questions to me in advance or during the call at sgngrouptalk@gmail.com

Conference Call Details:

Date: Thursday, January 12th

Time:  1:00 PM (ET); 12 Noon (CT); 11:00 AM (MT); 10:00 AM (PT)

Dial-in-number:  1-218-936-4141

Participant Access Code:  24247

Jay Daniell is the SGN Director and Host for Group Talk

Small Groups With Purpose: How to Create Healthy Communities

by Steve Gladen

Over the past fifteen years, small groups have become a vital way to build community in large churches. Nowhere has this been more apparent than at Saddleback Church. Now Steve Gladen, pastor of small groups at Saddleback, shares the secrets of that ministry’s incredible success in creating small groups with purpose.

This practical book walks church leaders through the questions they need to answer to develop their own intentional small group strategy. Built around the most commonly asked questions, Small Groups with Purpose outlines the step-by-step process of creating a successful small group ministry. Because it is built upon principles and not methods, this plan can be implemented in any size church. Each chapter ends with a list of questions for readers to answer to help them assess their current situation and their desires for the future. Personal stories, Scripture, and examples ground the discussion and show the system in action.

Pastors and small group leaders will find this book instrumental in making small groups work in their churches.

HARDBACK   13.59

KINDLE    9.89

Replenish: Leading From a Healthy Soul

by Lance Witt 

Every leader functions on two stages–the front stage and the back stage. The front stage is the public world of leadership. The back stage is the private world of the leader. There are many resources to help you succeed on the front stage. But who is talking to you about you and your backstage life?

In a caring, encouraging tone, Replenish shows you how to:

Prioritize matters of the soul
Develop healthy spiritual practices
Address problems that lead to burnout
Create a healthy rhythm in your life
Craft a healthy leadership culture
Develop better systems in your church
Move toward an unhurried life

If you ever feel alone, in over your head, or simply in need of replenishment, this book will offer welcome relief and a healthy way forward.

PAPERBACK   10.19

KINDLE   8.99

Connecting in Communities: Understanding the Dynamics of Small Groups

by Eddie Mosley

It’s hard to argue the importance of being in a small group. In a friendly, intimate setting, group members study the Bible together and discuss the issues and challenges of life. They pray, care for one another, and are missed if they don’t show up. Friendships are made.

Author Eddie Mosley is convinced that small groups are crucial to bringing about sustained life change. In this hands-on guide, he takes you from conception to implementation of a small-group ministry, sharing basic principles and processes that have been proven to make a difference in lives and communities. Whether you are considering starting a small-group ministry or already have one in place, you will discover various practices and processes that you can adapt to fit your needs.

Connecting in Communities will help you:

1. Determine what questions need to be answered before you start a small-group ministry
2. Map out a plan using your church’s perspective of discipleship
3. Organize and maintain a small-group ministry
4. Prepare and schedule leadership training
5. Periodically assess your ministry’s goals and progress

A great resource for pastors and small-group leaders, this book has everything you need for getting people connected and experiencing life together.

PAPERBACK   11.69

KINDLE   7.99

What’s Your Story? Icebreaker Questions for Small Groups

by Cheryl Shireman

You do not know a person until you know their story. We each have a story and it is filled with both factual details and personal details. I believe the amount we are willing to reveal to another is in direct proportion to the amount they are able to love us. You cannot love what you do not know. When a group of people get together, one of the quickest and easiest ways to get to know one another is through the use of questions that prompt us to tell our story. That is the purpose of this book.

The material is divided into three sections.

Getting to Know You is a series of factual questions that will allow you to know someone at a surface level.

Getting to Know What You Think questions are a bit deeper and allow you to begin to know a person’s experiences as well as their thoughts on various subjects.

Getting to Know What You Feel are a series of questions that often require a bit more of thought before answering.

New groups might want to start near the front of the book with questions that are easier to answer.

You may ask the questions in a variety of ways:

1. Ask everyone in the group the same question
2. Have group members open to a random page and answer the first question they see
3. Have group members open to a random page and ask another group member the first question they see You may also use the book in a variety of circumstances:
4. As an icebreaker for new groups
5. A fun break for groups that have been together a long time
6. As a “get to know you” session whenever a new person is added to the group
7. The first few minutes of every group meeting Fun to use for any small group!

PAPERBACK   6.99

KINDLE   2.99

In January, for whatever the reason, people are open to make that big “start”. Whether it is to work on weight, a habit, personal or spiritual goals; January, more than any other month, is the month to make the “start”. My wife, Lisa, and I use the first Friday of the month of January to set our spiritual goals through our Health Assessment. We have been doing that since 1999. Although January is a great time to assess and create goals, how our assessment looks in December is just as important. Ecclesiastes 7:8 says, “Finishing is better than starting” NLT.

How you finish will be the snapshot of your legacy. Luke 10:30-37 is a great parable that speaks to so many leadership parts of our life and ministry. It is the story of the Good Samaritan. The priest, the one who knew best the right thing to do—didn’t. It was the “nobody,” the Samaritan, who finished the day the way God wants us to! We all start our day with goals (knowing or not knowing) and we pray to finish according to our plan. But what if God wants to change our day, the finish? Do we adjust or walk on by like the Priest did? What if our finish isn’t God’s finish? This can play out in our day, weeks, months, years or lifetime.

Do you remember a while back the news the story in China where the toddler was hit by a car…twice! Security cameras caught 20 people walking by this toddler bleeding and unable to help itself. People looked, stepped around and even pretended the bleeding child wasn’t there. Then someone, a trash picker, stopped and did what 20 people wouldn’t do. They could of done something, but they wouldn’t! Twenty people that night wished they had finished better, they felt like a zero, however one became a hero.

Starting is very important! Finishing is just as important! Finishing God’s agenda God’s way is critical to your day, week, month, year and legacy! So, as you look at the time you have, whether it is a short time or a lifetime, think through this acrostic on FINISH:

Focus on your life plan. If you don’t have one, get one. Don’t know where to start? Seek the advice of someone you admire and ask them for suggestions. If you don’t know your end destination, you’ll never arrive. You don’t have to know it in perfect detail (as in your lifetime plan) but you should have a good idea for the short haul. What’s the main thing for you? I love what Martin Luther King Jr. said, “If a man hasn’t discovered something that he would die for, he isn’t fit to live.”

Inspire those you come in contact with. Hebrews 3:13 talks about how encouragement has the power to restrain sin. Inspire, encourage, and breathe life into people. It’s what God cares about! Whether it be a spouse, child, roommate, neighbor classmate, toddler bleeding on the road; do the right thing.

Never give up. You are the only you. God has you on this earth for a strategic purpose. He has no plan B, you are it. If He has called you to something, don’t leave till he releases you. Stay the course…period! Having others around you helps you navigate the tough days. Check out www.smallgroupnetwork.com to connect with others who are like minded!

Inform others of your plans. Telling others what you plan to do builds accountability into your plans. When others know, you win. Make sure you have a what, a when, and a who for each of your plans! Also, most people set goals too high and too soon. Make your goals crawl, walk and run. Make them easy in the beginning, and slowly increase over time. You have a lifetime ahead and we want you to finish strong and win the race. I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. Philippians 3:14.

Service, not serve-us! John 13 shows Jesus’ servant heart. Make sure you never arrive at a place in life where you can’t serve those around you. Service is your character curriculum. In John 13, any of the disciples could have served the other. They were too busy jockeying for position and missed the opportunity of a lifetime. Don’t miss the simple things before you to help those around you.

Heart, Head and Hands. To make the finish, you need to engage your heart, head, and hands. Here’s how. Heart – have others in your life that can check your soul care. Are you in a good zone or dangerous zone? Have people that can speak into your soul. Head – keep good stuff coming in and bad stuff out. Simple plan, but where so many don’t finish strong. The battle to all things, good or bad, starts in the brain. What fills your mind the most? Even neutral stuff like sports or shopping, can be toxic. Hands – stay close to the sheep. Never grow your ministry so large that you cannot stay in touch with the sheep. It may not be direct reporting, but get your hands dirty.

I am praying you not only start well, but use this acrostic to finish strong!

Steve Gladen is the Pastor of Small Group Community at Saddleback Church. His latest book is entitled Small Groups With Purpose: How to Create Healthy Communities. Leading Small Groups With Purpose: Everything You Need to Lead a Healthy Group, written especially for small group leaders, publishing the first week of February, is available for preorder now.

What kind of old person do you want to be? It’s a question you never think about in your twenties, rarely in your thirties, and only occasionally in your forties. But at least in my case hitting the big five-zero caused me to ponder this question with great frequency.

Turning fifty flipped an inner switch; I found myself asking a lot more questions. Not about next year’s vacation or the kind of car we might purchase or whether to change from ground beef to ground turkey. I found myself asking more life questions, legacy questions.

I became more self-reflective and introspective than ever before. I developed a growing awareness that the clock was ticking, and it was like I could hear the sweep of the second hand as it clicked off moments I would never recapture. I have reached that stage of life where more ministry road is in the rearview mirror than in the windshield.

It was during this new season of self-reflection that I picked up Gordon MacDonald’s The Life God Blesses. A seasoned ministry veteran with a lot of life insight, he asked the question, “What kind of old man do you want to be?” He’d been reading the story of Caleb, who at eighty-five was described as following the Lord God of Israel “wholeheartedly.”

MacDonald started looking around for other older men who were at their very best in their twilight years. “One thing quickly became clear. I have known a lot of old men, but my list of ‘emulatable’ old men was alarmingly short.”

This was true for a variety of reasons. Some had drifted into self-centeredness, while others had become impatient and cynical toward the next generation. Some had let the later years sour them into becoming grumpy and critical. Many simply lived in the past and were no longer leaning forward into the future. “When the list was finished, it included just a few names. In fact, I could count the names on the fingers of one hand.”

Securing a spot on MacDonald’s list of “emulatable” old men had virtually nothing to do with achievement or success as we often define it. It had more to do with character and attitude and “being.”

Having served in ministry more than three decades, I find myself less enamored with accomplishment and the bravado that often accompanies it. I am more drawn to men and women who live well than to those who live big. But those who’ve been in ministry a long time and are living well aren’t that easy to find. Why aren’t there more whose twilight years are their highlight years?

I think Henri Nouwen gives us a clue.

I began to experience a deep inner threat. As I entered into my fifties and was able to realize the unlikelihood of doubling my years, I came face to face with the simple question, “Did becoming older bring me closer to Jesus?” After twenty-five years of priesthood, I found myself praying poorly, living somewhat isolated from other people, and very much preoccupied with burning issues. Everyone was saying that I was doing really well, but something inside was telling me that my success was putting my own soul in danger.

I’m intrigued by that statement: “my success was putting my own soul in danger.”

I’ve thought a lot about those words. When we have accomplished a measure of success, we can begin to coast.  Pastors write thousands of sermons, lead thousands of meetings, and prepare thousands of budgets. (or at least it seems like it). Twenty or twenty-five years of pushing and striving and leading take its toll. We can feel drained, fatigued, and even jaded. The thought of one more vision message or capital campaign just doesn’t crank up the adrenaline like it once did.

At this point in life we’re very capable of leading out of our experience and knowledge rather than the deep well of a healthy soul. On the outside we have the answers, but on the inside we have questions. To further complicate matters, our physical stamina begins to diminish.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying passion for ministry goes away. I am saying it feels different than when you first started. As a twenty-five-year veteran, you face a whole new set of challenges. The triple-A of adrenaline, ambition, and achievement aren’t enough to sustain you anymore.

Here’s the irony. At just the time most people look at you as the picture of success, you are aware of some desperately broken places in your life. Like Nouwen, we have to admit that decades of ministry hasn’t necessarily made us more like Jesus. Our sermons are better, our leadership is better, our staff management is better, our planning is better, but our intimacy with Jesus? Not so much.

We have a gut-wrenching choice to make. We can put our ministry on autopilot and move into image-management mode. Or we can do the hard work of reinventing ourselves, of reworking the last chapters of life. If you have been drinking at the well of ambition and success and drivenness . . . that well will run dry. It’s time to drill a new well that will sustain you as you get older.

For many of us in ministry, our challenge is quite different. It’s not success that threatens our soul but the perceived lack of success that now becomes the threat to us as we age. Ministry hasn’t turned out like we thought it would. We’ve done the best we could, but more often than we want to admit, ministry has been more babysitting than leading, more mundane than miraculous, more life-taking than life-giving.

Some days we want out. We daydream about what it’s like on the outside. We fantasize about a prison break from the constraints of ministry. We wonder what it would be like to have a “normal” life. We ponder how it would feel to have weekends off. We dream of not being constantly scrutinized.

If ministry hasn’t turned out like you expected, I want to ask you the same question. What kind of old man or woman do you want to be? I’m not asking what kind of ministry you want to have. I’m asking about you, as a person, as a Christ follower. You can’t undo the past, and you can’t control all of your circumstances, but you can plot a different trajectory for your future.

Lance Witt is the founder of Replenish Ministries, an organization devoted to ministering pastors to help them become healthy, holy, and humble. He also serves as the Pastor for Strategic Development at Thomas Road Church in Lynchburg, Virginia. replenish.net

Steve Gladen, pastor of small groups at Saddleback Church for more than a decade, takes you step-by-step toward a healthy, dynamic group with focus and purpose. For the new small group leader, the seasoned leader who feels their small group lacks purpose, or the leader who is itching to move their small group to the next level, Leading Small Groups with Purpose is the road map to follow.

Every chapter includes ideas that your small group leaders can implement immediately, as well as ways to develop their small group over time. With Gladen’s expert help, you small group leaders will learn how to define success clearly, develop a personal leadership plan, invite members into their group, and help members fulfill the Great Commission and the Great Commandment.

Read what other ministry leaders are saying about Leading Groups With Purpose…

“This is the one book that you simply must get into the hands of every one of your small group leaders. Biblical, intentional, and focused, this book is full of real-world advice on the practical matters of running a group. Steve Gladen gives your leaders the information they need not only to guide their groups but also to develop their members toward maturity and health. Want a healthier church? Develop healthier small groups. Start here.”–Rick Warren, Saddleback Church

“When it comes to small groups, Steve is not just a theoretical expert, he is a consummate practitioner. Groups have the power to change lives; this book has the power to change groups.”–John Ortberg, senior pastor, Menlo Park Presbyterian Church; author, The Me I Want to Be

“I wish this book was in the hands of every small group leader in America. The power of God’s work in community is not in the form (small groups); it is in the function (the purposes) lived out in deep, authentic relationships. Steve Gladen’s biblical focus, practical instruction, and game-day experience make this an essential for all of us committed to transformation, not simply transmission of information.”–Chip Ingram, senior pastor, Venture Christian Church; president, Living on the Edge

“I am thrilled to endorse this powerful work by Steve Gladen. Steve and Rick Warren have pioneered one of the most successful small group systems in America, and Steve’s quiet, behind-the-scenes guidance has made this happen. I trust that you will realize the profound success their emphasis on Scripture and discipleship has birthed in Saddleback Church. Steve is humble, helpful, and powerfully passionate in connecting members in fellowship. I look forward to this book’s impact on your small group leaders.”–Larry Stockstill, senior pastor, Bethany World Prayer Center

“I’m so glad Steve Gladen wrote this book! Leading Small Groups with Purpose is an incredible resource that should be in the hands of every small group leader. It’s filled with practical insights and time-tested wisdom on how to lead a group to be effective and balanced. His comprehensive approach gives clear direction on how to achieve health and mission in community. Don’t miss it!”–Jud Wilhite, senior pastor, Central Christian Church, Las Vegas; author, Torn

Leading Small Groups With Purpose is available right now. Order yours today and help your small group leaders take their small groups to the next level!

I love going into model homes. But not for the reason you might think. I like them because they’re a clutter-free zone. No trash, no piles, no stacks. The kitchen counters aren’t littered with small appliances and week-old bananas. For neat freaks, model homes are utopia.

The problem with a model home is that it’s an illusion. Families create messes. Model homes aren’t real life. That’s the way I often feel about the topic of simplicity. The image of an uncluttered, ordered life sounds great, but it just doesn’t seem like real life.

Let’s face it. Life—and ministry—feels anything but simple these days.

Maybe you can resonate with these words of Charles Wagner: “Amid the confused restlessness of modern life, our wearied minds dream of simplicity.” It is mind-boggling that he wrote these words in Paris in 1895, before the invention of the car, the airplane, the TV, the computer, or the internet.

The world is not going to slow down. Technology is not going away; 24/7 access to everything is here to stay. Life and ministry are more complex and challenging than ever.

Yet inside me is a quiet longing for something simpler.

For most of my life, simplicity has felt illusive. In fact, it’s rarely been on my radar. If I’m honest, I thought simplicity and margin were for navel-gazers and underachievers. There was a badge of honor in taking on too much, living too fast, and working unreasonable hours.

When I was exhausted and stressed, I’d often deceive myself with, “It’ll get better. This is only for a season.” But it didn’t get better. And when one season of ministry was finished, it was simply replaced with a new season of demands and pressures.

At least for me, the first step toward simplicity was taking full responsibility. I had to own my stuff and admit that when it comes to simplicity I am my own worst enemy. Most of the complexity and clutter was my own doing—saying yes to too many requests, not having healthy boundaries, not knowing my limits, and always trying to please everyone contributed to a cluttered life.

I was not the victim, I was the perpetrator. No elder board or deacon group or staff member or spouse or friend was going to simplify my life for me.

I also have to realize I will never drift toward simplicity. The drift is always toward complexity and clutter. Take your garage, for example. If you neglect it, it will naturally drift toward disorder.

Pursuing simplicity is like trying to keep barnacles off a ship. These unseen, unwanted passengers clandestinely attach themselves to the hull and cause significant drag. Did you know barnacles cost the US Navy about a billion dollars a year in extra fuel and maintenance?

We must be proactive and preemptive in guarding our lives from complexity.

So, how do you do this, practically? You get crystal clear about your values and priorities.

Mindy Caliguire writes, “Simplicity means taking action to align one’s exterior world with one’s interior values and commitment to God.” When my values get clear, decisions get simple. Not easy, but simple. Simplicity is not necessarily about doing less. It’s about using your priorities to filter opportunities and options.

One of my biggest challenges is learning to say no. I love ministry, and I love serving churches. So when opportunities come along, my default response is yes. I think to myself, I really don’t have the bandwidth for this, but I’ll figure out a way to get it done. This mindset has added complexity to my life and stress to my marriage.

Because this is such an ongoing struggle for me, it’s important for me to step back regularly and evaluate my activity in light of my priorities. Just this week I had two men I respect speak into my life about this issue. Their observation was that my focus was diffused and fragmented, and they challenged me to simplify. They were right, and their candid feedback was a gift. I am learning that a diffused life is a confused life.

As the German artist Hans Hofmann eloquently said, “The ability to simplify means to eliminate the unnecessary so that the necessary may speak.” That’s exactly what my friends were telling me to do. By removing those things that really aren’t a priority in my life, I will create space for the “necessary” to speak. I must trim the excess so there is room for the essential.

•       Own your life. Take responsibility, and don’t play the victim card. The problem is internal, not environmental.

•       Get alone and determine your values and priorities. Write them down and regularly review them.

•       Make the hard decisions. The hardest part is having the courage to carry out the necessary decisions that will help you simplify.

•       Perform regular maintenance. Practice the discipline of planned neglect.

I’ve devised a formula that helps me in my pursuit of simplicity: Clarity + Courage = Simplicity.

First, I must get clarity around what’s really important in my life. Because of our drift toward clutter and complexity, this must be revisited on a regular basis.

But it’s not enough to simply have clarity. I must also have the courage to execute based on clarity. I can have clarity around my priorities, but without the courage to make the necessary changes, I will not move toward simplicity.

Five Guys, the famous east coast hamburger chain, understands simplicity. On their website is the question, “Does Five Guys plan to add any menu items (i.e., milkshakes, chili, etc.)?”

Their answer: “Five Guys does not currently have plans to add any items to our menu. We follow the philosophy of focusing on a few items, and serving them to the best of our ability. If we were to add to our menu, then you can guarantee that we would only do so if we could serve the highest quality product possible. For example, there are a lot of great milkshakes out there, and at this point we think that others are doing it better than we could!”

They are clear about who they are and clear about who they aren’t. They’ve resisted chasing after ever opportunity. The result is focus, simplicity, and a really great burger.

Lance Witt is the founder of Replenish Ministries, an organization devoted to ministering pastors to help them become healthy, holy, and humble. He also serves as the Pastor for Strategic Development at Thomas Road Church in Lynchburg, Virginia. replenish.net

Life is full of choices. Every day you have to decide countless moves. Some affect your legacy. Your attitude through each choice is as important if not more important. Peter faced many choices. Some were good, some were not. When Christ was under arrest, Peter made a poor decision and denied Christ three times. In John 21 Peter made a good choice and accepted the call to ministry by reiterating three times he loved Christ and loved what He loved.

Attitude, how he handled a situation, played a big part with Peter’s legacy. The way Peter handled his denial of Christ, and how Judas handled his denial of Christ, produced two complete different situations. Peter repented, served Christ and helped birthed the church. Judas’ sorrow led him to hang himself.

How do you handle choices and with what attitude? It comes down to which basin will you go to? As a leader you have two basins you can use in your Small Group Ministry. One is found in Matthew 27:24 and the other is found in John 13:5.

In Matthew 27:24, Pontius Pilate uses the basin to excuse himself of the matter at hand. He turns to frustration in the account with Jesus and walks away from leadership. He does what is easy, not what is right. In contrast, in John 13, Jesus uses the basin to model servant leadership. He had an attitude of serving. At a time when the disciples were fighting for status and positioning, Jesus showed what mattered. He did what was right, not what was easy.

So in your ministry, your small group, your family, and your situations in life; which basin do you go to? In this Christmas season, challenge your small groups and every member to do what is right, not what is easy. Go to the basin in John 13, not the one in Matthew 27.

Steve Gladen is the Pastor of Small Group Community at Saddleback Church. His latest book Small Groups With Purpose: How To Create Healthy Communities

Fellowship – To get to know about each group member’s family, ask them to draw stick figure pictures of the people in their family. On your sample, have Mom and Dad stand taller than the kids, who are arranged in a stair step order. Ask members to write the people’s names and add a simple graphic touch that reveals something unique about each person in the family. If the oldest daughter plays basketball, for instance, draw her holding a ball. Then have group members share their works of art.

Discipleship – Ask group members to watch television for an evening and, as they do, to list all the messages, implicit as well as explicit, in both programs and commercials, that run counter to the truth of God’s Word. Encourage group members to point out and discuss these messages with their children. Then have group members bring their lists to the next meeting. As you talk about the items on the lists, specify the biblical truths they contradict. Then discuss what Christians can do to stand strong against these powerful and ever-present messages.

Ministry – Have someone from your group contact the person in charge of the church nursery and offer your group as volunteers to work in the nursery some weekend. Your group may need some minimal training or instructions to do so, but your effort will be worth it. Also, as you work in the nursery, take a few moments to pray for each baby and his or her parents.

Evangelism – Prepare a traditional turkey meal together and invite people who don’t have a place to go to for Thanksgiving: international students, single people without family nearby, and people new to the community. For a variation on this theme, prepare a meal for people in need – people in a homeless shelter, people at a rescue mission, or people in transit at a bus station. But consider preparing the meal on a day other than Thanksgiving. Many organizations offer food on that one day, but those folks still need to eat on the other 364 days of the year.

Worship – Have your group worship and sing a cappella. Nothing compares to the sound of voices lifted to the Lord in heartfelt praise.

Steve Gladen is the Pastor of Small Group Community at Saddleback Church. His latest book, Small Groups with Purpose: How to Create Healthy Communities, was published earlier this year.

For more ideas like these, read 250 Big Ideas for Purpose Driven Small Groups.